List of Jasper Fforde Quotes

I Have The Death Sentence In Seven Genres.

Fiction Wouldn't Be Much Fun Without Its Fair Share Of Scoundrels, And They Have To Live Somewhere.

I Was On Hpd--heathcliff Protection Duty--in Wuthering Heights For Two Years, And Believe Me, The Procaths Tried Everything. I Personally Saved Him From Assassination Eight Times.

The Industrial Age Had Only Just Begun; The Planet Had Reached Its Best Before Date.

Reading, I Had Learned, Was As Creative A Process As Writing, Sometimes More So. When We Read Of The Dying Rays Of The Setting Sun Or The Boom And Swish Of The Incoming Tide, We Should Reserve As Much Praise For Ourselves As For The Author. After All, The Reader Is Doing All The Work - The Writer Might Have Died Long Ago.

If You Expect Me To Believe That A Lawyer Wrote A Midsummer Night's Dream, I Must Be Dafter Than I Look.

Sorry," [hamlet] Said, Rubbing His Temples. "i Don't Know What Came Over Me. All Of A Sudden I Had This Overwhelming Desire To Talk For A Very Long Time Without Actually Doing Anything.

Her Majesty Is One Verb Short Of A Sentence.

Who Do Readers Expect To See When They Pick Up This Book? Who Has Won The Most Troubled Romantic Lead At The Bookworld Awards Seventy-seven Times In A Row? Me. All Me.

Goodness Is Weakness, Pleasantness Is Poisonous, Serenity Is Mediocrity And Kindness Is For Losers. The Best Reason For Committing Loathsome And Detestable Acts – And Let’s Face It, I Am Considered Something Of An Expert In This Field – Is Purely For Their Own Sake. Monetary Gain Is All Very Well, But It Dilutes The Taste Of Wickedness To A Lower Level That Is Obtainable By Almost Anyone With An Overdeveloped Sense Of Avarice. True And Baseless Evil Is As Rare As The Purest Good.

The Universe Always Moves From An Ordered State To A Disordered One; That A Glass May Fall To The Ground And Shatter Yet You Never See A Broken Glass Reassemble Itself And Then Jump Back On The Table.

A Missing Arm Might Ruin Your Symmetry. Personal Asymmetry Where I Come From Is A Big Taboo And Brings Great Shame On The Family And Sometimes Even The Whole Village." "do You Then Have To Kill Yourself Over It Or Something?" "goodness Me, No! The Family And Village Just Have To Learn To Be Ashamed--and Nuts To Them For Being So Oversensitive.