Kindness Isn't Just A Virtue, Its A

I Wouldn't Hurt A Flea. I'd Finger A Spider Though.

If You're A Host Of A Video Show And You're On The Cleanest Show On Television For Eight Years, People Want To Say, 'well, That's What That Person Does.' That Was The Dilemma For Me, Career-wise.

Some People Rely On Rumors And Gossip Because They Are Devoid Of Any Original Thought.

My Haircutter Figured Out I Whine Less If I'm Under General Anesthesia. I Just Hope When I Awaken They Haven't Given Me A Brazilian Wax.

Stop It, Stop Lighting Your Butthol On Fire, And Everybody Listen To Me. If You Light Your Ass On Fire, I Hope You Have Boxers Or A Filter Of Somekind, Because If Your A Bareass Person. Not A Lot Of People Have Done This. Stop It. This Is Why. You Can Cauterize Your Asshole Shut, So When You Fart It Has Nowhere To Go And You Can Have A Fart Attack.