Never Slap A Man Who's Chewing Tobacco.

What The Country Needs Is Dirtier Fingernails And Cleaner Minds.

If You Want To Know When A War Might Be Coming, You Just Watch The U.s. And See When It Starts Cutting Down On Its Defenses. It's The Surest Barometer In The World.

The Only Way To Solve The Traffic Problems Of The Country Is To Pass A Law That Only Paid-for Cars Are Allowed To Use The Highways. That Would Make Traffic So Scarce, We Could Use Our Boulevards For Children's Playgrounds.

It's Almost Worth The Great Depression To Learn How Little Our Big Men Know.

There's The One Thing No Nation Can Ever Accuse Us Of And That Is Secret Diplomacy. Our Foreign Are An Open Book, Generally A Check Book.