There Are Two Kinds Of Speeches: The

There Are Two Kinds Of Speeches: The Mother Hubbard Speech, Which, Like The Garment, Covers Everything But Touches Nothing, And The French Bathing Suit Speech, Which Covers Only The Essential Points.

The Thing I Would Like To Do Most Is To Find Somehow To Bring Peace To The World. It Has Eluded Me.

The Prospect Of Penury In Age Is So Gloomy And Terrifying That Every Man Who Looks Before Him Must Resolve To Avoid It; And It Must Be Avoided Generally By The Science Of Sparing. For, Though In Every Age There Are Some Who, By Bold Adventures, Or By Favorable Accidents, Rise Suddenly To Riches, Yet It Is Dangerous To Indulge Hopes Of Such Rare Events; And The Bulk Of Mankind Must Owe Their Affluence To Small And Gradual Profits, Below Which Their Expense Must Be Resolutely Reduced.

If The Purpose Of Lamentation Be To Excite Pity, It Is Surely Superfluous For Age And Weakness To Tell Their Plaintive Stories; For Pity Presupposes Sympathy, And A Little Attention Will Show Them, That Those Who Do Not Feel Pain Seldom Think That It Is Felt.

Evil Acts Of The Past Are Never Rectified By Evil Acts Of The Present.